Integrative Therapy, Healing, Coaching and Well-Being Newsletter from an Energy, Spiritual and Posiitve Psychology Perspective.
by Philip H. Friedman, Ph.D
Director: Foundation for Foundation for Well-Being
P.O. Box 627
Plymouth Meeting, Pa. 19462 (suburb of Philadelphia)
You can read this and earlier newsletters on the internet at:
You can email me at: firstname.lastname@example.org
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WELCOME TO THE: “INTEGRATIVE THERAPY, HEALING, COACHING AND WELL-BEING NEWSLETTER FROM AN ENERGY, SPIRITUAL AND POSITIVE PSYCHOLOGY PERSPECTIVE”.
I want to thank the over 1200 plus members of this List from 6 continents and everyone who has ordered my book, audiotapes, manual and the Friedman Scales from my new web site at:
GRATITUDE: TO ALL MY FRIENDS, FAMILY, COLLEAGUES, CLIENTS and CUSTOMERS
B. SIGNATURE STRENGTHS AND POSITIVE PSYCHOLOGY
C. COACHING FEEDBACK
D. INTEGRATIVE HEALING MANUAL AND IMAGERY HEALING TECHNIQUES
E. TELEPHONE COACHING SESSIONS
FRIEDMAN HEALING TECHNIQUES
In previous months I discussed the following
ENERGY/SPIRITUAL HEALING TECHNIQUES which are described in my INTEGRATIVE HEALING MANUAL.
A) ACT (renamed the ACTIVE CHOICE TECHNIQUE)
B) CART (CREATING AND RECEIVING TECHNIQUE)
C) HEART (HEALING AND RELEASE TECHNIQUE);
D) LIGHT (LIGHT IMAGERY GRATEFUL HEART TECHNIQUE).
E) MATT (renamed the MIRACLE ACTIVATION TRIGGER
F) TASTE (renamed the TRIGGER AND SOFT TOUCH TECHNIQUE)
and POWERFUL IMAGERY HEALING TECHNIQUES ON AUDIOCASSETTE.
1. RELAXATION AND MEDITATION
2. CREATING AND MANIFESTING WHAT YOU WANT
3. BRIEF AND ADVANCED FORM OF MANIFESTING WHAT YOU WANT
5. INNER JOURNEY TO THE HIGHER SELF
8. SUNDAY (HEALING MUSIC)
01. Forgiveness is the key to happiness.
02. Forgiveness is the greatest healer of all.
03. Forgiveness is the releasing of judgments, grievances, attack thoughts and shoulds (darkness) and replacing them with peaceful, loving, uplifting and healing thoughts (light).
04. Forgiveness is the letting go of anger, hurt, fear, shame and guilt (“the emotionally reactive ego”)
05. Forgiveness is the releasing and transforming the polarities/dualities of victim/victimizer; right/wrong; black/white; good/bad; win/lose etc:
06. Forgiveness is the letting go of separateness, i.e, the thought of separation and replacing it with thoughts of unity.
07. Forgiveness is the letting go of the hope for a different and better past.
08. Forgiveness releases the blocks and barriers to the presence of love, joy, peace, innocence, harmony, wholeness and balance.
09. Whatever you give (for give ness) you give to yourself, thus all forgiveness ultimately is self-forgiveness.
10. Forgiveness is a major shift in perception and attitude.
11. Forgiveness (radical) is the awareness that nothing harmful ever happened and only love exists.
12. Forgiveness allows one to see the God/Light/Love/Innocence within oneself and the other.
13. Forgiveness reveals that all minds are joined.
14. Forgiveness requires a little willingness initially and abundant willingness eventually.
15. Forgiveness needs to be repeated over and over again to every little irritation, frustration and guilt and every major attack thought, anger, resentment, hurt, disappointment and bitterness.
16. Forgiveness (spiritual) requires the help of a higher power or force (higher mind, holy spirit, higher Self, Jesus, Jehovah, Buddha, Brahmin, Shiva, Allah, etc.)
17. Forgiveness reveals equality and oneness.
18. Forgiveness (total) is the path to salvation and enlightenment.
19. Forgiveness (along with Gratitude) activates more miracles than anything else.
20. Forgiveness reconnects/realigns us with the experience of God/Goddess/All There is,
allowing us to remember that “God/Self/Being Is”.
B. SIGNATURE STRENGTHS AND POSITIVE PSYCHOLOGY
In a previous issue of this newsletter I listed the 24 strengths developed from the Positive Psychology program at the Univ. of Pa. (http://www.psych.upenn.edu/seligman/strengths/ or www.authentichappiness.com) and described some of my own strengths using their system. I have also asked a number of clients to complete this strength questionnaire. An equally valuable set of strengths can be learned and discovered from the excellent book “Now Discover Your Strengths” by Marcus Buckingham and Donald O. Clifton, Ph.D. and their accompanying website, www.strengthsfinder.com, which is developed by the Gallup Organization. They refer to the strengths in their system as “Signature Strengths” and they are discovered by taking an on-line questionnaire on their website.
(many of my clients have learned about their strengths using this questionnaire). The Gallup signature strengths questionnaire is somewhat different than the U. of Pa. strengths questionnaire because each question requires you to choose between a set of
bipolar statements. In addition there are currently 34 strengths in the Gallup system not 24 and to take the signature strengths questionnaire you have to buy Buckingham and Clifton’s book “Now Discover Your Strengths” (highly recommended) and use the code at the back of each book to access their web site. Still the book and website information together is very valuable and well worth the money and time.
Moreover, as you will see from reading the list of my top 5 Signature Strengths below, the findings are somewhat different though complimentary to the U. of Pa. strengths questionnaire. Both strength perspectives fall, however, within the domain of Positive Psychology and are well worth becoming familiar with. I would, in fact encourage the readers of this newsletter to learn their strengths, using both systems, and to encourage their clients, colleagues, friends, family members etc. to do so as well. (Personally both my son and wife as well as many of my clients have done so). Incidentally, the 2003 International Positive Psychology Summit which I will be attending, will be held on October 2 - 5, 2003 at The Gallup Building in Washington, DC.. The 2001 International Positive Psychology Summit which I attended and presented at in 2001, was excellent so I expect this one will be as well. You can check out the latest summit updates at the Gallup Positive Psychology Center website: http://www.gallup.hu/pps/.
My 5 Main Signature Strengths and short descriptions of each from the 34 Signature Strengthfinder themes presented in the wonderful book by Buckingham and Clifton “Now Discover Your Strengths” and on the http://www.strengthfinder.com website are:
You love to learn. The subject matter that interests you most will be determined by your other themes and experiences, but whatever the subject, you will always be drawn to the process of learning. The process, more than the content or the result, is especially exciting for you. You are energized by the steady and deliberate journey from ignorance to competence. The outcome of the learning is less significant than the "getting there."
Your excitement leads you to engage in adult learning experiences-yoga or piano lessons or graduate classes etc.. It enables you to thrive in dynamic work environments.
You are inquisitive. You collect things. You might collect information-words, facts, books, and quotations-or you might collect tangible objects such as butterflies, baseball cards, porcelain dolls, or sepia photographs. Whatever you collect, you collect it because it interests you. And yours is the kind of mind that finds so many things interesting. The world is exciting precisely because of its infinite variety and complexity. So you keep acquiring and compiling and filing stuff away. It's interesting. It keeps your mind fresh. And perhaps one day some of it will prove valuable.
Excellence, not average, is your measure. Taking something from below average to slightly above average takes a great deal of effort and in your opinion is not very rewarding. Transforming something strong into something superb takes just as much effort but is much more thrilling. Strengths, whether yours or someone else's, fascinate you. You polish the pearl until it shines. You choose to spend time with people who appreciate your particular strengths. Likewise, you are attracted to others who seem to have found and cultivated their own strengths. You want to capitalize on the gifts with which you are blessed. It's more fun. It's more productive. And, counterintuitively, it is more demanding.
Your Achiever theme helps explain your drive. Achiever describes a constant need for achievement. You feel as if every day starts at zero. By the end of the day you must achieve something tangible in order to feel good about yourself. And by "every day" you mean every single day-workdays, weekends, vacations. No matter how much you may feel you deserve a day of rest, if the day passes without some form of achievement, no matter how small, you will feel dissatisfied. As an Achiever you must learn to live with this whisper of discontent. It does have its benefits. It brings you the energy you need to work long hours without burning out. It is the jolt you can always count on to get you started on new tasks, new challenges.
Things happen for a reason. You are sure of it. You are sure of it because in your soul you know that we are all connected. Yes, we are individuals, responsible for our own judgments and in possession of our own free will, but nonetheless we are part of something larger. Some may call it the collective unconscious. Others may label it spirit or life force. But whatever your word of choice, you gain confidence from knowing that we are not isolated from one another or from the earth and the life on it. You are considerate, caring, and accepting. Certain of the unity of humankind, you are a bridge builder for people of different cultures. Sensitive to the invisible hand, you can give others comfort that there is a purpose beyond our humdrum lives... your faith is strong.
Some of the other of the 34 Signature Strength themes include:
People strong in the Developer theme recognize and cultivate the potential in others. They spot the signs of each small improvement and derive satisfaction from these improvements.
People strong in the Fairness theme are keenly aware of the need to treat people the same. They try to treat everyone in the world fairly by setting up clear rules and adhering to them.
People strong in the Empathy theme can sense the feelings of other people by imagining themselves in others' lives or others' situations. They can sense the emotions of those around them. Intuitively, they are able to see the world through others eyes and share their perspective.
People strong in the Responsibility theme take psychological ownership of what they say they will do. They are committed to stable values such as honesty and loyalty.
People strong in the Harmony theme look for areas of agreement. In their view there is little to be gained from conflict and friction, so they seek to hold them to a minimum. When they know that the people around them hold differing views, they try to find the common ground.
People strong in the Deliberative theme are careful and vigilant. They are private people. They know that the world is an unpredictable place. Rather than denying risks, they draw each one out into the open. Then each risk can be identified, assessed, and ultimately reduced.
People strong in the Context theme look back because that is where the answers lie and to understand the present. It is only by casting their mind back to an earlier time, a time when the plans were being drawn up, that the present regains its stability. It was a time of blueprints.
People strong in the Communication theme generally find it easy to put their thoughts into words. They are good conversationalists and presenters.
People strong in the Restorative theme are adept at dealing with problems. They are good at figuring out what is wrong and resolving it.
People strong in the Intellection theme are characterized by their intellectual activity. They are introspective and appreciate intellectual discussions.
People strong in the Woo theme love the challenge of meeting new people and winning them over. They derive satisfaction from breaking the ice and making a connection with another person.
(You can order the “Now Discover Your Strengths” book from http://www.gallup.com/publications/strengths.html or
www.amazon.com or www.bn.com)
C. COACHING FEEDBACK
I indicated in my last newsletter I would summarize and present the feedback I received from the 3 Coaching clients who had 3 free coaching sessions:
Summary Integrated Feedback (on 08/10/03) from
3 Coaching Clients (3 Free Sessions Each)
Marie: Social Worker and Energy Healer (North Carolina)
George: Psychologist and Marital Therapist (New Jersey)
Gloria: Writer, Speaker, Educator (New York)
1. What did you find most interesting/enjoyable about the 3 Free coaching sessions?
a) I enjoyed your sense of humor and ability to look at the big picture.
b) I liked the affirmations and the tapping on positive things.
c) I’d like to say that I could really feel your genuine warmth and interest in what I was telling you as we spoke.
d) I liked the weekly form because it helped me touch base and self-focus where I’m at.
e) In just a few moments only you have been able to quickly and succinctly give me an answer that made me feel heard and gave me direction. You simply said it was about my grievances and lack of self-forgiveness. It just was what I was ready to hear----simply perfect! And the treatment you did still resonates with me days later.
f) After having 4 experiences with coaches, where you stand out, Phil, is in your responsiveness and positive, direct, caring attitude.
g) In our last session I also experienced your flexibility in using the phone session to best benefit me, the client, and calling upon your vast catalog of tools to move me through my issue...Our final session on Friday was remarkable. Receiving the energy treatment from you was a welcome surprise with miraculous aspects.
2. What did you find most beneficial/helpful about the coaching sessions?
a) Tapping and affirmations were very useful.
b) You helped me to put things into perspective and to take the situation I was in more lightly.
c) Having some one who understood my language and perspective was very helpful.
d) The insights and caring attitude I received during session 3 and learning more about your work, as an energy psychologist--- all the web pages on your site pales as compared to one brief telephone session with you.
e) You are interactive, and unafraid to give your opinion. (I worked with a coach for 6 months, who was a CSW, and she did little more than listen to me and parrot my actions back to me).
3. a) What positive strengths, abilities, talents, qualities resources did you observe/see/find in your coach during the coaching sessions?
a) you have a very systematic dedication, sense of purpose and commitment, a willingness to share and a desire to help.
b) you have a wealth of knowledge to draw from and many tools in your tool box.
c) you have a depth and breadth of experience both as a psychologist and as an energy facilitator.
d) you were able to sort through my stuff and mirror things back in a way that helped me find clarity.
e) your responsiveness, direct matter of fact attitude of looking at the essence of something and positively guiding me was very helpful.
f) I liked your service so much that I asked you to come here and teach a class for therapists!
3 b) What positive strengths, abilities, talents, qualities resources did you observe/see/find in yourself during the coaching sessions?
a) I remembered that I am competent, funny, angelic and capable.
b) I recognized my openness to discovery, confidence and readiness to share.
c) I realized that I am capable of coaching myself to do the work I am guided to do (but I need help with unblocking my energy and stuckness that is stopping me from following through with what in my heart I want to do)
4. What were the major experiences you cleared/healed/resolved, enhanced; etc..information/resources you learned; attitudes you shifted and/or positive actions you took during or after the coaching sessions.
a) I was able to take a bigger view of the situation and see some humor
b) I was able to take things more lightly, which for me is a good thing.
c) I was able to shift my attitude towards my work place and make a major change in my workplace situation.
d) I was able to find more balance.
e) After session 3, I have a clearer mental presence that tells me when I am thinking grievance, attack thoughts and so now I’m in a position of awareness to ask for replacement thoughts. (“forgiveness”)
f) I’ve created more of a sense of distance between me and my mind so that I can witness when I’m chewing over and over on an attack thought. (“witnessing”)
g) I would highly recommend you, Phil, as a coach. You don't have to suffer!!!!
h) Phil, my gratitude and thanks to you! It was unexpectedly more than a pleasure working with you.
D. INTEGRATIVE HEALING MANUAL AND IMAGERY HEALING TECHNIQUES
This Integrative Healing Manual first describes the COPERS and BETSI-HI model of Well-Being followed by a section on motivation and the 7 step re-empowerment process. This is followed by sections on the 12 step creation and manifestation process; the 7 step alphabet of change; the 11 step forgiveness process; and processes for working with the 5 subscales of well-being: emotional stability; self-esteem/self-confidence; joyfulness; sociability and happiness. Then there is a section on 30 daily lessons for creating high levels of well-being. A variety of energy and spiritual healing techniques are next discussed such as the Creating, Allowing and Receiving Technique (CART); the Miracle Acupressure Tapping Technique (MATT-Versions 1, 2 and 3) which includes the Psychological Uplifter, the Brain Balancer or 9 Gamut Technique and the Forgiveness Affirmations. This is followed by the MATT Parts Integration Technique (MMPIT) developed by Lynne Namka; the Acupressure Chakra Technique (ACT) and the Tap and Soft Touch Energy Technique (TASTE). The next section of the manual describes
the Healing and Release Technique (HEART) and the Light Imagery Grateful Heart Technique (LIGHT). Finally the manual presents and describes the Secrets of Wealth, Wisdom and Well-Beings, Parts 1 through 5.
The Creating Well-Being Guided Imagery Tapes are a set of 8 powerful guided imagery plus music tapes that enhance deep relaxation; facilitate contact with a source of inner wisdom: help you create and manifest what you want in life; forgive yourself and others; learn how to be grateful etc..
The tapes alone can facilitate a major transformation in your life if listened to regularly.
E. TELEPHONE COACHING SESSIONS
The Free telephone coaching client sessions are completed. If you would be interested in 1 FREE coaching session in exchange for 1 PAID coaching session send me an email at firstname.lastname@example.org, briefly describe what issues you would be like to be coached on and what your goals for the next 30, 90 and 365 days are. Thank you.
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Copyright (c) 2003, all rights reserved. Permission is granted
to copy or distribute the FREE Integrative Therapy, Healing, Coaching and Well-Being Newsletter so long as this copyright notice and full information about contacting the author is attached. The author of this newsletter is Philip H. Friedman, Ph.D. Contact him by email at: firstname.lastname@example.org or for integrative therapy, integrative healing or integrative coaching (the Catalyst Triad) send an email to Coachwell1@.com or Integrativehelp@aol.com or call 1-610-828-4674.
Please contact the author for permission if you would like to post this information on any web site or other source. Thank you.